#my life since january has been
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did you know that uhm. the locked tomb <3
I DID KNOW THIS IVE BEEN SAYJNG
#i’ve been insane for the past month <3 i’m so hyperfixated we are not making it out of here#my life since january has been#finish locked tomb. immediately start rereading the locked tomb#i’m on nona now i am. going to do another reread after. to annotate my copies. yeah you could say i’m a little normal#asks#morgan#SORRY ABOUT YOUR NOTIFS BTW IFE BEEN HAVING FUN
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To the victor goes the spoils (or something like that)
WIP. not sure if I should keep working on it though
#secret life spoilers#secret life#my art#sketch#wip#art#mcyt#mcytblr#mcyt fanart#artists on tumblr#trafficblr#life series#goodtimeswithscar#this has been sitting in my folders since january rrip#i feel it in my gut i have to do some colour/anatomy studies before i come back to it bc the energy is *almost* right but not quite
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seriously can catastrophes stop happening for five minutes my brain is already fried from the ones we're already experiencing
#I fucking. missed d&d tonight by accident#I straight up forgot#and just didn't show up to the session#my sleep schedule is absolutely fucked#I should be sleeping now but brain won't shut up#my creative output is the lowest it's ever been and I've been in some level of depressive funk since like early january#I am just deeply unfathomably exhausted#like mentally and spiritually#all the time#my memory and sense of time are both shit#my spelling is worse than it used to be for some reason??#I really don't know what to do to make my brain start functioning again it's frankly worrying me#I couldn't even handle college so it should come as no surprise that I'm reacting poorly to the world being a perpetual screaming trash fir#and yet#idk it's been hitting again lately that I have never succeeded at anything in my life and just keep tripping and falling up for some reason#fucking everyone is in hell right now and with my overall success rate I should be dead in a ditch but I'm actually doing spectacularly#due to a series of improbable accidents and weird circumstances that happened to turn out in my favor instead of completely fucking me#aside from the looming spectre of my various failed attempts to have some kind of life trajectory#it just doesn't feel like this can keep up forever#like surely at some point the luck has got to run out I can't just keep living like some kind of folkloric trickster archetype#but my motivation and sense of purpose kind of died after the last failed attempt so I'm still just here#doing whatever this is#maybe I should drive out to the coast#maybe staring at the ocean would fix me I've been away from it for too long#I mean it can't make me worse#I should wait until further into summer though so I don't have to drive back in the dark#everyone around here has trucks with those goddamn LED headlights and I've got a little sedan that's directly in their blast zone
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Does anyone know if the documentary will have English subs available? I am but a dumb American who needs some joy in these trying times and I think the YLE doc will help lmao
#blind channel#asking because Joonas posted clips with subs and like. I need it#also forgive me if this has been asked and answered I haven’t been on here in a hot minute because my life went to hell in January#and hasn’t gotten better since
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Drawing from class two weeks ago, prof was introducing us to photoshop because not everyone had used it before, so those of us that were already familiar with it were goofing off lol
Small update; I have recently been given courage to come out and say that this blog will be temporarily put on hold. I'm not falling behind in my studies per se, but they've become such a massive source of stress that I can't focus/don't have time to draw for myself lately. I can confidently say my mental health is the worst it's been since last year; guilt for not talking to people and for not being more active on here is eating me alive, so I think it's best if I take at least one of those pressures off of myself.
When I'm back I'll likely have some classwork to show off, and maybe if the stars align, some personal drawings too haha. Until then, I'll still be somewhat active on my alt (@dawntheduckrb) and might even post some doodles there, so feel free take a peeksies if you want :D (posts are all over the place there though, so don't follow if you don't want dash clutter lol)
Sorry for any worry I caused; see y'all in May :)
#sorry for up and half going away like that#am not doing well at all#and its been a while since ive actually posted#(ive actually made two posts since the cat one but privated both bc silly brain)#so i wanted to formally say i am stepping away so people dont think im like#dead#so uh#im alive#my brain is just eating itself alive right now#and i gotta prioritize the could-leave-me-in-debt-for-the-rest-of-my-life event over the beloved hellsite (regrettably)#not that i wasnt already prioritizing it (my upload rate has plummeted since january)#but i want to let yall know what is going on#I've noticed more people on my alt lately that dont follow me; so if that was yall checking in on me#then thank you so much#it didnt go unnoticed
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Six Lives
welcome to the life to the historecap
show how we survived how we got to be last
everybody tries but there is only 6 lives
yes six runs of the game as you watch the story
TNT and flames it's all bloody gory
no play is the same cause there only is 6 lives
until the next life
#thoughts#look in the notes for the next part#life series#six#six the musical#traffic life parody#parody#this has been running around my head since January#3rd life#last life#double life#limited life#secret life#real life
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hi I’m incredibly dumb but I just wanted to ask if 01/10/23 if that is day/month/year or is it month/day/year. Also just wanted to say that I love both of your games and I’m sitting at the edge of my seat and holding my fingers for the next update, I’m also not sure which one I’m more excited for.
it is month/day/year! sorry for being american 😔
#thank you!#but yes unfortunately there has been no update since january. no one hates it more than me lmfao#fighting for my life to get bc out by halloween#and then i will be shifting solely to tnp for like. the next 2-3 months or however long it takes#ask#anonymous
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genuinely tweaking that its october next week
#lit rally WHERE did this year go#but it feels like several lifetimes since january this year#this has been the most monumental 18 months of my life for sure
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I just realized it's been 10 years now since my parents briefly separated, tried to move back in together, and then finally got divorced after I fucked off to my uncle's in alaska...... 🍾🍾🍾🍾🍾
#it has been almost 10 years since I had to live w that man what a blessed life to live#october will be the 10 years of all that latter stuff but january was when my dad got kicked out briefly lmfaooooo
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I finished all 4 bookcases! Removing all books, dusting books, dusting & wiping shelves, donating books I no longer want, and reorganizing them. It is so great to have them all properly done after 6 months of disarray.
I am going to do a "library" list. Aka writing down title and author of every book I have, since the last time I did that was like.... high school over 10 years ago.
As of right now, of what I physically own, my reading list cover to cover is: 53 books, 2 holy books, 12 comics, and 4 large-DK books. I'll know better once I've got my library list.
Have I been reading the same single book for multiple months..... yes; am I dyslexic which makes reading difficult, yes; is it hard to read physical books because I have to sit up and I rarely do that, yes. But the fact I'm even making progress on one book is an accomplishment.
(69 tasks on Room Project done, 24 to go)
#my bookcases have been in disarray#since january 9th 2024#after i had to remove all the books from the lower shelves due to flood warning#thats why i took the opportunity to do this undertaking#and I finished it last night#.....only rook me 6 months#im a neat freak so this has been driving me crazy to have unfinished#really want to write down library/inventory for 2 of them#the managa book case I don't think needs a library document because i think I have one#library#books#book#reading#accomplishment#michibooks#my whacky life
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🧸 ?
#as much as i enjoy fandom spaces#the negativity in them sometimes can just. get me so shocked#ill be just casually enjoying a series with my friends and stuff#and then ill go see hows the fandom and oh boy#the fandom#i just usually surround myself with gay friends and in everyday life the topic doesnt really come up for me#since i admittedly do not talk much to strangers#or people im not 100% sure if i can trust#but internet is something else so when im encountering homophobia in the fandom like im just#i dont know i guess i kind of forget internet isnt build just out of gay people#or at least supportive people#and the whiplash i get...#anyway this has been my rant#i should be back to posting art soon im working on comms a lot to help my friend with vet bills still!!#i have a lot of personal stuff i wanna draw this year i hope i can do it all#january literally almost done and i like#blinked
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everytime i think im done ranting i remember something else LMFAO this one is extra long i hit tag limit god mf damn
#self#for instance.....my mom wants me to cut off everyone who is still tied to the school#and im so mad at myself for feeling a certain type of way when the campus manager called me not too long ago basically to tell me she doesnt#trust the girl who did this shit and she wasnt mad at me but was also mad at me for bringing her to her dads house#for reference we were trying to get a cat from the campus managers dads house LMFAO#and i honestly cannot wait to speak to her again and be like 😔 god dammit you were right like you were every single time#i just dont understand the wiring in her head to think the shit she says and does to people is normal and okay and how she doesnt realize it#is literally a mental health break. when i finally told my mom the first thing she said was shes probably off her medication#which.....probably isnt wrong sadly coming from someone who has borderline and very easily can lose it#but the difference is i dont give in to the urges to try to hurt everyone around me in every way i can#and me and her have said before that we thought she might also have borderline because we were very similar#but god damn does she love proving that if she has it its extremely severe or its something else entirely#on an honest note. shes incredibly narcissistic and i know her mom is part of the reason shes that way bc she was given princess treatment#her entire fucking life and then doesnt understand when other people dont treat her the same way#i hate rambling about this and i hate it that it is bothering me so fucking bad but like ???#if youre going to decide that you can put our past aside period and move on then fucking do that and stop bringing the past up as a way to#hurt me and the people around you???? she acts like shes not done horrible fucking things to people. so sorry i wrote a letter that was very#honest at the time. so sorry that when you found out i apologized for it and said i regret it because 2 weeks after my apology i no longer#regret writing it. if its making school a living hell for you....theres probably a reason for that girlfriend#i am not the person who put that shit in your folder#though i seriously fucking doubt its actually in her folder shes probably assuming it is#and youre the one who made a complete ass of yourself to every educator that ever stepped foot in that building#that has nothing to do with me that you are a literal warning given to every new educator!!!! i havent even been in school there in months#yet IM the problem??? how am i the problem when i graduated in fucking january???? everything since then falls on you#AND YET AGAIN! MIGHT I MENTION! IT IS NOT JUST MY LETTER!!! THERES AT LEAST 2 OTHER ONES!!!!!#BECAUSE IM NOT THE ONLY PERSON SHE DOES THIS SHIT TO!!!!#god sometimes i sit back and realize that theres a reason she regresses as a person and i do not#im not going to sit still anymore and let someone walk all over me and she can thank herself for that#shes who taught me that blocking and running as fast as i can doesnt fix anything#so here we are bitch. youre not blocked and im sure youre sitting at home thinking about how youre right about everything
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ONE MONTH UNTIL I SEE SLEEP TOKEN I AM SO EXCITED
#ramble on exie#sleep token#i’ve been waiting for this show since i got the ticket in january#this has been the longest four months of my life#this is the second most impulsive thing i’ve done for music#and it’s funny that both times i’ve been financially stupid about music sleep token has been involved :)#(it wasn’t intentionally about them the first time but it’s funny they were there in retrospect)
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p sure there is a wizard out there who has beef with me bc my 2024 so far has been so unbelievably fucked up I can only describe it as Cursed.
#jaytp#genuinely actually my life has been falling apart since january#and I was FINE but. its starting to catch up to me!!!!!!!!#i am now having daily breakdowns bc of how awful and stressful everything is#and it just??? keeps getting worse??????#i have zero idea how i am possibly supposed to get through all this
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people are so nice at uni ?!?! what the fuck??!!
#unexpected!#this has been the greatest academic semester of my life#all my classes are fascinating and i'm making a ton of friends and i'm sooooo busy in such a good way#but yeah since i've been doing well i've been expressing myself with fashion and makeup a lot more#and i've been getting compliments a lot recently and it's just really sweet#like wow we're all in this together huh#or something#i just like feeling like i've opened up and become comfortable#making eye contact in the hallways and enjoying every moment#january was a good month and february is off to a wonderful start#(my parents like my boyfriend. W boyfriend W parents life is good)#june shines#the trials of juniversity
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i'm extremely depressed
#i'm on the waitlist for social housing - the employment services for disabled people - the autism support service#once approved for social housing it takes another 10-12 years to get somewhere to live#applied for autism support service back in january and six months later i was 70th on the list#employability said december is the earliest they'd contact me#i'm tired all the time even though i'm not anaemic anymore#there's no way out#people always say 'it gets better'#EVERYTHING and i mean FUCKING EVERYTHING has gotten worse since i was 12#every year of my 20s has been a shitshow#there is no evidence in life that things get better#things don't improve#they never have#and i'm going to die on this miserable fucking island#misc: personal#depression cw
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